And I will try, to fix you
by McPerky
Summary: 'Lights will guide you home' They're both lost, can they find eachother before it's too late? Not good at summary's just read please. FINALLY UPDATED!
1. Chapter 1

**1**

It was horrible to see her lay there, not being able to breathe on her own or do anything else for that matter. She looked so peaceful, so incredibly beautiful.

They say I have to go home, I have to take a shower and take care of myself as well. But I can't. I can't leave her here alone. Better yet I won't leave her here alone.

The day we got back together after the shootings I promised her, and myself, that I would never leave her again. And if I go now, it would feel like leaving her, again. I can't do this to her, not now not after everything that's happened. It's my fault that she's lying there in that ICU bed, it should've been me instead. Not her, not the love of my life, it's all my fault. If we had taken a cab in the first place….

We would've been home right now, laughing, making love or we'd be watching a movie for all I care about. Those days seemed very far away now. God I would give anything to turn back the time, anything!

The door opens behind me, I don't even bother to look up. I don't care who's going to tell me to go home. I ignore the person, just as I've been doing for the last couple of weeks. Weeks?! My heart skips a beat when I realize how long it's been, five weeks, three days and eleven hours. That's how long it's been since I looked in to those beautiful eyes, that's how long it's been since we shared a kiss.

''Go home'' Miranda Bailey says to me while flipping through her chart.

''I'll stay with her until you come back, just go home and take a shower at the very least. I'll page you if anything changes'' she says in her usual tone.

I ignore her, we've been doing this for the past five weeks and I'm not planning on changing this routine while she's still in here, hooked up on I don't even know how many monitors.

''Now you listen to me'' she starts in her stern voice, but I interrupt her because it's not going to work on me.

''No you listen to me _Doctor_ Bailey, I'm not leaving her side, you and everybody else here has to accept that. Now if you don't mind I'd like to be alone with her again.''

''Doctor..'' I turn my head to show her I'm really not interested in what she has to say. She squeezes my shoulder before leaving the room.

This is how it went almost every day, one of our friends would come in and I ignored them until they left. They cared, I know they did, but I seriously couldn't care less about what they felt at the moment. I couldn't handle my own pain let alone theirs.

After a while, I honestly don't know how long because a minute seemed to last an eternity in here, the door opened again. It's Addison, I can hear her high heels clicking on the floor.

''Has anything changed?'' but I'm the one asking her.

''I'm still not entirely sure, but I think it might work. She's young, her eggs are still fertile, but I'm not sure if she'll ever be able to carry her own child.''

I nod to let her know I understand what she's saying. She told me this 3 weeks ago, and a couple more times after that. After the 'accident'', Addison did 2 surgeries on her. Her uterus is still intact but she got stabbed in her abdomen so many times they just can't say if it all helped enough.

She kneels before me, ''don't try to get me out of here Doctor Montgomery, it won't work'' I say to her, while never taking my eyes off of my lovers face.

''Look at me'' but I don't, she stands up and leaves the room and just before the door closes behind her I hear her say something ''She doesn't want to listen'' ''so you didn't tell her she's flying in?'' I hear Christina ask her, and then the doors close and all sound is blocked out. I really don't care who they mean by 'she' it could be the freaking queen of England for all I cared, I wasn't going to leave her side.

I didn't get much sleep last night, not that I ever do though. People are right when they say that the nights are the worst, it's silent everywhere and all you hear are the beeping machines surrounding the bed. I dreamed, I dreamed that she wasn't intubated anymore. She was waking up very slowly and just as she opened her eyes I woke up. That's just plane cruel if you ask me, because I'd give anything to look in to her beautiful eyes again.

I couldn't sleep anymore so I start telling her one of our days together, I started doing this in the second week and I started at the beginning, at Joe's. It was painful to recover all these memories but it was the only thing keeping me sane. So now I tell her the story of us moving in together. I tell her what a total chaos it was cause Christina hadn't moved out yet and she and Owen were spending a lot of time in the apartment as well. I was in the middle of a funny quote when I hear the door open again. I stopped talking and closed my eyes, praying that whoever just came in would take the hint and leave.

''You can't stay in here forever you know'' an all but too familiar voice sounded in the room.

I look up in shock to face the person, is this real? I ask myself, or am I imagining this again? I know I dreamed of her coming over so many times, she's my person, my Yang to Grey sort of thing. But she left! She left a couple of months ago and I hadn't heard from her since. I turn my attention back on the shim of the woman I love, lying in a hospital bed with God knows how many tubes attached to her beautiful body.

''I need you to go home and take a shower'' she says in a friendly voice.

''Doctor..'' but she quickly interrupts me,

''Don't you 'doctor' me! Don't you even dare going there with me!'' she raises her voice. ''I heard you pulled this 'no first names thing' on everyone, even Mark for crying out loud! But don't you dare use that on me! I'm your person! You don't get to treat me like that.'' She walks to the other side of the bed to make sure I can see her.

''I know it took me way too long to get her'' she starts out in a friendlier tone. ''But I'm here know, and you have to listen to me. You're going to go home and take a shower, Mark will stay with her and I'll go with you. He'll page us if the situation changes.'' I want to argue with her but she's too quick, again.

''This wasn't a question sweetie'' she says a bit more firm then before.

''It's my fault'' I whisper quietly.

''It's my fault she's laying here… It should've been me in that bed not her'' I tell her while there're tears are silently running down my face.

''I'm going to take you home and take care of you, we can talk about this later Arizona'' she says before pulling me into a hug.


	2. Chapter 2

**2**

**Arizona's POV  
**It took her and Mark another half an hour before they got me to leave Calliope's side. The moment I stepped out of her room I felt a mixture of relive and guilt wash over me. She probably didn't even notice I was gone, but if something happened and I wasn't there… I can't think about that. I hesitated to turn around and go back to her, but my best friend seemed to know what I was thinking because she grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the exit. The moment I breathe in the fresh air I feel nauseous, I can't even take 5 steps without emptying my stomach next to the nearest bench. Teddy hands me over a tissue before dragging me towards my apartment building, she has a firm grip on my wrist, like she's afraid I'm going to run away. Not that I could, I don't seem to have any control over my body whatsoever. I glance at her side, 3 months! I haven't seen my best friend in 3 months. One part of me wants to hug her and tell her how much I've missed her, but the other part wants to kick her because she made me leave Calliope's side.

Before I know it we stand in front of my apartment, she opens the door and the smell of the place overwhelms me. It smells like Calliope in here so much I almost throw up again. She pushes me into the bathroom gently, and helps me undress. I'm glad she does because I don't know if I would've managed on my own. She sits down on the bathroom floor while I let hot water run over my body. God I needed this more then I thought. I let the water run over my face, hoping it'll wash away my fears as well.

''I'm going to get you some clothes, are you okay in there?'' she asks me.

Does she think I'm going to drown myself or something? I would never do such a thing, as long as Calliope's fighting so am I.

How on earth did I get here? I ask myself. But I already know the answer to that question. The reason Calliope's lying in that ICU bed is me, it's my fault. I told those guys to back of, I lured them out of their cages. Callie stood in front of me, protecting me, using her own body as a human shield. Before I know it I start to cry, it starts out softly but it soon turns in to the freaking Niagara Falls. Then I feel two arms surrounding me, holding me tight.

I don't know for how long I stayed in the shower, crying my eyes out with Teddy's arms wrapped around me. But I'm now sitting on the couch, with a steaming cup of tea in my hands.

''I'll be right back, I just have to change into something a little less wet.'' Teddy smirks. Apparently she didn't take her clothes of when she stepped into the shower with me.

''Yeah you better do that cause you look like hell'' I joke. This is probably the first joke I make in 5 weeks and 5 days. I hear the shower turn on but before I know it she's back.

''Do you maybe want to get some sleep?'' she offers. I shake my head 'no' and stand up, implying to her to leave again. This time she doesn't argue, she just sighs and follows me out the door.

When we reach Callie's room I can see Mark sitting next to her, holding her hands with tears in his eyes. The door's not entirely closed so I can hear him whisper things to her.

''Cal you have to wake up, you can't leave us all here, you can't! It'd kill Arizona Callie! Do you know how much she has slept in the past couple of weeks? I'll tell you, almost none! She loves you sweetheart, she's worth fighting for! You have to come back and safe her, she's lost without you. And I am to…'' he says while there're tears running down his face.

Teddy stands next to me, watching Mark cry over his best friend.

''You're not the only one who misses her Zona'' she says quietly.

''She's his best friend sweetie, you know how much she means to him, just talk to him. Or me, or Yang for that matter. But you have to start sharing this, it'll kill you if you don't.''

I just stand there, watching Mark and Calliope… She's right, I'm not the only one who's going crazy over this. But until now I didn't let myself think about them, the others, her friends and family.

''We went out to dinner that night'' I start.

''To celebrate our engagement... Do you know we've been together for over 2 years now after the shootings?'' Teddy knew this was a rhetorical question.

''We left the restaurant around 11 pm, there were these guys following us.'' I take a deep breath before I continue.

''I thought I recognized them from the restaurant so I didn't really look to much in to it. I wanted to walk home, it was a beautiful night and after I made certain kinds of promises she agreed to walk instead of taking a cab. Then all of a sudden one of the guys started making very rude jokes about women, lesbians in particular. After a few minutes I couldn't take it anymore and I asked them to stop. This wasn't my best move, but they where so damn rude I just had to say something! They were practically yelling that all women are stupid and that they should all stay at home and cook or something. Oh and according to him women who are lesbians never had a 'real man' in their life. Who on earth says these kinds of things?!''

Teddy soothed me by patting me gently on my back.

''Continue please'' she asks me after I calm down.

''Well, they came up to us and started making comments about my ass and stuff. I tried to ignore them, but Callie had a tougher time doing that. I tried moving us in a different direction, but then they made comments about Calliope's breast and something in my snapped. Before I know it we're in an alley and that's when…..''

But I couldn't continue anymore, it was all too much. Teddy seemed to understand this since she didn't push me to continue the story. She took my hands in hers and squeezed them tightly. At that moment Mark walks out of the room

''You sure do smell better'' he jokes.

''Thank you Mark, for you know… everything.'' I whisper.

He pulls me into a big bear hug,

''Listen roller girl, you're not alone. If you need me, for anything, I'm just a page away'' he says into my hair.

''I'm going to talk to the chief for a minute, you go in there okay?'' Teddy says.

So I walk into her room again, and as I take my place besides her bed again I feel a sudden wave of tiredness hit me. I give her a soft kiss on her hand before I fall into a restless sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

**Arizona's POV  
**In the next couple of days I went home more often, Teddy always lingering over me, trying to make me stay home longer. But I only went home to get a shower or some clothes. I'm now talking to Mark outside of Calliope's room, I tried telling him what happened, but just like Teddy I couldn't get passed the point where they cornered us in the alley. And just like Teddy, Mark didn't push it. They were the only two people I seemed to be able to talk to.

''Arizona'' I turn around and see the chief facing me.

''Can you come with me for a moment?'' he asks, his voice sounded friendly but very tired.

I looked at Mark, he nodded at me, telling me without words that he'd stay with Callie until I came back.

''Of course chief Webber'' I say and follow him into a conference room.

There the whole team of Callie's doctors awaits me. My legs refused to take another step, I just looked at them in disbelief. This couldn't be good, all of them sitting around the table with a serious look on their face. Teddy walked up to me and guided me to the seat next to her.

''Dr Robbins, we have to discuss Dr Torres's situation'' the chief started. Teddy took my hand to let me know she was there for me.

''We have a few options..'' he tried to continue but was interrupted by the head of Neuro, Dr Sheppard

''Arizona, Callie's bleeding again. There's a small vessel leaking, near her hypothalamus. I need to get in there and close it.'' He said this in a firm voice but I could see compassion in his eyes.

''We didn't caught it sooner because of the major vessel in her temporal lobe'' little Grey finished for him.

Everyone in the room waited for someone else to continue, I realized that they where all looking at Teddy.

''As you know the repair we did on her cardio valve was only temporarily, Dr Altman and I have to go in again to prevent it from rupturing. It's a pretty simple procedure but seeing her recent history I'd say the risk becomes larger every day'' Christina told me.

Teddy squeezed my hand more tightly.

''We also discovered that one of her ovaries is highly infected. Since she's in the ICU for so long the antibiotics I put her on don't help her, Dr Karev and I will have to take it out'' Addison says, looking tired.

I know she probably hasn't slept since discovering this, trying to find another way to cure her, so I believe her when she says that this is the only option. I look in Bailey's direction, waiting for her to tell me why she needed to open Callie up as soon as possible. Our eyes locked, but she couldn't talk, her mouth opened a few times but there were no words coming out.

''Appendicitis'' Meredith blurred out. I stopped staring at Miranda and looked her way. ''We have to take out her appendix'' she says before returning to stare at the table again.

Four?! Calliope needs four freaking surgeries?! You've got to be freaking kidding me! I think I'm going in to shock, Teddy gives me some water and then the chief starts talking again.

''Everyone who's not a attending out!'' he says in a I'm – your – boss – so – don't – you – dare – question – me voice.

''That means you to Dr Yang!'' Christina opened her mouth to argue but Meredith shoved her out of the room and closed the door behind her.

''You understand what this means Robbins?'' he asks me more gently.

When I didn't answer him he continued,

''it means that you have to make a decision who goes first.''

At this the whole table, accept for Teddy, started arguing over who was in more need to cut Callie open first. It went on for a few minutes before I asked them to stop. They didn't hear me,

''SHUT THE HELL UP!'' I yelled at all of them.

Everyone fell silent at once, looking in my direction.

''Okay first things first, why isn't there a anesthesiologist here?'' I ask them.

''Her case has been discussed in their department, they told me the outcome'' the chief says.

''Well then you tell me, how long can she go under?'' I ask him very firmly.

''Two, two and half hours at the most'' he answered me.

My surgeon brain starts working, making connections in my brain, telling me to choose between bleeders and infections. Yes, that's the question, stop the bleeders first or take out the infections. Bleeders, infections, bleeders, infections. I already knew the answer from the moment I realized I had to make a decision.

''Derek, how big is the bleeder?'' I ask him.

''Not big, but Arizona I hope you understand the need to close the vessel, she could loose brain function if I wait to long''

''Yes Derek I'm a doctor too, and I understand the risks. Do you think she will be able to breath on her own again?''

''I expect so yes, but…''

I turn my head in Teddy's direction

''Can her heart hold another surgery Teddy?'' I ask her, now this was the real question, how much more could her heart take after all the stress, surgeries and now infections.

''It's hard to say, but I think one is the max before I go in myself'' she answers.

''But Arizona, even if I go in first I don't think she can handle four surgeries'' she tells me, her eyes pleading with me to understand.

''She won't have to'' I say before I take a sip of water.

''Addison, you'll go in first. You should be able to get her ovary out in 45 to 60 minutes tops. After that Grey will take her appendix out, I've seen her do it in 30 minutes. This will put us on two hours at the most, and if the anesthesiologists are right she'll be able to hold that. Now after 24 hours, and 24 hours at the most, she's going under again. Teddy will start her valve replacement and Derek you're last in line.''

I take a deep breath before I continue.

''I want it understand that the only people who are going in that OR are the surgeons I just mentioned. No residents, you are all very capable doctors so I really don't see the need for them to assist you. And before you start Chief Webber I know this is a teaching hospital, but you know as well as I do that one more bacteria could literally kill Calliope. And since you have a cold and Miranda has a small child I don't want you in there. Agreed?''

I ask them and the nod their heads in agreement.

''If any of you needs any assisting during your surgery page Grey, that goes for you too Teddy. I don't want Christina in that OR, she's too emotionally attached to this case. Addison I want to ask you to stand by when she goes in, just in case.''

''Of course'' she says.

''I don't want updates, I only want to talk to the people who actually operated on her when they're done. Teddy will come update me at the end. The gallery stays closed, she's our friend and colleague so she deserves a little privacy. I'm going to tell Mark, I expect you'll all be ready within the hour?'' they all said their 'yes' and 'of course'.

''Good, thank you all. Oh and chief will you inform the residents?''

I didn't wait for his answer, I stood up and walked out of the room, in search for Mark. He would be my rock for the next 30 hours or so, I had to tell him what he'd be up to.


	4. Chapter 4

**4**

**Arizona's POV  
**The first 24 hours went by fast, Addison and Meredith were both ready within 75 minutes, they really pushed them selves. Teddy decided it was necessary to do the valve repair after Meredith finished up, this went good as well. She came to me afterwards telling me that it wasn't in her hearts best interest to put her under within the next 5 days. Derek wouldn't hear of it, he said he could wait 12 hours at the most, if he'd go in later he was almost certain that the risk of loss of brain function would increase every hour. He left me and Mark outside Callie's room to discuss what our next step would be. But I didn't know what to do, and neither did Mark.

''If this was any other patient I'd say wait as long as you can'' I turn around and see Christina standing beside me.

''But this isn't any other patient, it's Torres. She's badass at what she does. Teddy told me why I couldn't be in the OR, first I thought that you were high because of lack of sleep. But then I felt kind of proud, I'm not so robot after all I guess.''

She continues with a weird smile on her face

''She's a doctor Arizona, a badass surgeon. If she looses brain function that'd be it for her. She won't be happy doing anything else you know that. You know that besides the butterflies and cheeriness and rainbows you've seem to infect her with, she's still McHardcore, ask any other resident and they'll agree. You can't make her put down her scalpel Roller girl. So as her former roommate and drinking buddy, but especially as a badass surgeon myself, I ask you to make the right decision here.''

She wanted to walk away but I stopped her

''Christina, thank you'' I say barely above a whisper.

She shrugged her shoulders ''whatever, but if either one of you tells this to anyone else I will hunt you both down and kick your asses'' she added before walking away.

As she turns the corner I know what I have to do ''page Sheppard, tell him to be ready to operate on Callie within 8 hours'' I tell Mark before stepping into the room and taking my place at Callie's bed again.

It took Derek 5 and a half hours to come over to us, that's almost twice the amount of time that he'd thought it would take him in the first place. But as he enters the room I know she's alright, he has this smile in his eyes, very McDreamy like.

''The bleeder was harder to locate then I originally thought, but she pulled through'' he said with a hint of a smile on his face.

Mark stood up to hug his buddy and let out a sigh of relief. Teddy joined us,

''we think she'll be ready to wake up with a week or so. But because of everything that has happened we don't know if she lost any brain function until she wakes up.'' Derek continued.

''Thank you, thank you both very much'' I whisper to them, but they caught it and both smiled at me.

''Now why don't you and Mark go home and take a shower, when you'll be back she'll be all settled in'' Teddy suggests, but it wasn't really open for discussion from the tone she used.

If Callie pulled through this I know she'll be able to handle it for another half a hour, I think happily when Mark and I cross the road to our apartment building.

The next days were hard, I went back to one single task which was sitting next to Calliope's side, too afraid to not be here when she'll wake up. I talked to Mr. Torres at least four times a day. Her family left after the third week on my request, I couldn't handle their sadness as well. They were still in Seattle but only stopped by when I wasn't there, when they came by unexpected I hid in a empty on call room. I couldn't face them knowing that I was the reason their beloved daughter and sister was laying in a hospital bed.

I have a weird feeling when I hang up the phone, Carlos just told me he and his family were going home for a couple of weeks. Why would they do that? Had they given up on her? She was almost there, it was a matter of days, hours maybe before she'd wake up.

''You just talked to her dad didn't you?'' Mark asks as I enter her room.

''Yeah and he told me the strangest thing'' I start

''I know, I talked him in to leaving for a while'' he interrupts me.

''Why would you do that?'' I ask him surprised but kind of relieved.

''When she wakes up it'll be only the beginning. I figured it's going to be hard enough for the both of you without them smuttering you'' he smiled.

''Thanks Mark, you're a big help'' I give him a kiss on his cheek and move another chair next to her bed.

We sit in silence for a while, each starring at Calliope.

''She loves you, you know'' he says all of a sudden,

''I know, she loves you too'' I reply.

''I know'' he smiles and stands up ''want to get some dirty cafeteria food?'' he offers.

''I'll get it, you stay here'' and before he can argue I stand up and leave the room.

I have a sudden urge to scream, so I run to the nearest elevator. When everyone else leaves I start screaming at the top of my voice. This feels so good, and it helps, at least for a while. I got some nasty looking pastries and run up the steps taking two at a time. I hate it that everyone stares at me, all caring and feeling sorry for me.

I throw a pastry in Mark's direction ''thanks'' he says with a disgusted look on his face. We laugh a bit, it's funny how we became so close in such a short period of time. When he leaves to go to the bathroom I gulp in sudden need of oxygen. Her fingers moved! Or am I hallucinating again? No! Here it is again, she's moving her fingers!

''MARK COME OVER HERE!'' I yell at the closed bathroom door, he comes rushing back.

''MARK! She's moving her fingers! Page Derek!'' I'm still yelling at him.

I start to cry but this time they're happy tears. When Mark runs out to page Derek I start talking to her

''Come on sweetie you can do this, come on open your eyes!'' I whisper softly in her ear. I stroke her cheek, and then very slowly she opens her eyes.

''There you are beautiful'' I say while there're tears streaming down my face.

There's something in her eyes I can't quite place.

''How do you feel? Do you need something?'' I ask her, she moves her lips but I can't hear what she's saying.

I move my ear next to her mouth ''where am I?'' she asks me softly. She's been in a coma for nearly 7 weeks, of course she's confused.

''You're in the hospital sweetie, you were in a accident. But don't think about that now, what's most important is that you're alive and awake'' I smile at her.

She tries asking me something so I move my ear closer to her again, I can't totally understand what she's saying. When I listen closely it sounds like… I stand up and back off towards the wall in shock. This can't be happening! I look at her eyes, fear, that's what I saw in them earlier. In that moment Mark runs in closely followed by Derek and Teddy. They start running all kinds of test, Mark walks up to me not understanding why I'm not euphoric.

''Arizona what's wrong?'' he asks me concerned.

I can't tell him, I can't talk, I can only stare at Calliope in disbelief.

''Her heart sounds good'' Teddy tells us,

''Reflexes are good too'' Derek adds.

''Now Callie can you tell me what year it is?'' he asks her with a big smile plastered over his face.

He thinks he's asking her just another protocol question, which she'll answer without any hesitation and everything will be okay.

''My…. My….. my name is Callie?'' she asks terrified.


	5. Chapter 5

**5**

**Arizona's POV  
**I run out of the room, I have to get out of there, away from her as soon as possible. After everything that happened, after all the waiting… I didn't even think about this being an option. I mean I had when Derek told me about her brain function and all that but I choose to ignore it. In hindsight this was not one of my wiser decisions. Teddy catches up with me near the hospital exit

''Arizona!'' she yells out, but I don't care.

I have to get out of here, I have to get out of this freaking hospital!

''Arizona!'' she yells at me again, but this time she stands in front of me

''She….she''' I start.

''Breath Zona, breath. Stay with me here girl'' she says to me.

I start laughing, all of a sudden the irony hits me. Teddy looks at me confused.

''She doesn't even know her own name!'' I laugh out loud.

She grabs my shoulders and shakes them back and forth,

''snap out of it!'' she looks really serious and I can't help but stop laughing immediately.

''Mark's paging little Grey to help Sheppard run some test, he thinks it's only temporary but he can't be sure. And as a doctor you know as well as I do that she needs you right now. You need to help her remember Arizona! You need to help her get through this! You know the drill, except for Sheppard, Lexie and me no other doctor should go in there, it will only confuse her more. I haven't discussed this with Mark but I think you and him should stay guard for the first 24 hours. After that we'll see how she feels.'' She talks, or yells, at me like I'm a private in the marine's.

She know this will work though, it reminds me of my father and I would never talk back to him. So I follow her into the hospital again, up to the room where the love of my life doesn't even know I exist.

''We want to give you as little distraction as possible, so besides Dr Altman, Dr Grey and myself only Dr Robbins and Dr Sloan can come in. It's necessary you talk to them, it doesn't matter about what subject, but they have to help you connect the dots in your brain again. Do you understand Callie?'' Sheppard asks her.

She nods in his direction, I stand behind Mark, afraid to face her.

''Good, now I'm monitoring you from over there'' he points at the nurses station. ''Callie meet Dr Sloan and Dr Robbins'' he says before leaving the room.

Mark walks up to her and shakes her hand ''I'm Mark Sloan, I'm a surgeon as well'' she smiles politely at him ''nice to meet you, again I guess'' she laughs bitterly.

Mark walks over to me and pushes me slightly in her direction, ''this is Dr Arizona Robbins'' he introduces me.

The moment I shake her hand I feel another emotional title wave hit me, ''if you'd excuse me'' I say while hurrying out of the room before Mark can stop me.

The moment I leave the room Derek walks up to me, ''you!'' I point a finger at him and raise my voice. ''YOU!'' I start yelling now,

''Arizona'' he begins

''Don't you 'Arizona' me! You broke her! You! She can't even…''

''Arizona sst!'' Lexie says.

''Don't you fucking 'ssst' me Lexie! He!'' and I point at Derek again

''he FUCKING BROKE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD!'' and I start hitting him.

He blocks my punches but doesn't say or do anything else.

''You took her away from me!'' I yell at him, people around us stop and stare.

''That's enough'' Mark says and he lifts me over his shoulder.

''Don't fucking pick me up Mark! Put me down right now!'' I demand, I start slapping him on his back but he ignores me and walks on through.

''Mark what the hell are you doing?!'' Teddy asks him confused at the sight before her.

''Solving a problem, go to Callie she's alone, I got this one'' he says in a fatherly voice, and before I know it he puts me down on a bed in an on call room.

''It's not his fault Arizona. And you don't need to go and tell him he 'broke' her, you don't think he doesn't feel guilty enough as it is?'' he starts while taking a seat in front of me.

''But'' I start to argue but he cuts me short

''No I won't have it Arizona! He's like a brother to me and I don't need him more messed up then he already is, you get that?'' he says to me in a tone I don't want to argue with.

And then it hits me, with all this and me freaking out on top of it, I must remind him of Mr. Clark….

''I'm such a selfish bitch'' I rest my face in my hands and I feel a few more tears escaping my eyes. I'm actually surprised I'm not dehydrated yet.

''No you're not, your one of the most generous persons I know. But please stop swearing it really doesn't suite you'' he pokes me in my side.

''I don't know what to say to her Mark'' I look him in his eyes, hoping he'd give me an answer or solution that'd make everything okay again.

''Be you! Be your own happy-roller girl-rainbows-and-butterflies-McPerky you! God! I don't even recognize you anymore, don't make this harder on her.'' He smiles at me brightly but I can see the hurt and pain in his eyes.

''Should I tell her? You know, that I'm her girlfriend?''

''Her fiancée you mean?'' he winks at me, a smile unwillingly creeps over my face at the sound of that word.

''Only you can decide that Arizona'' he says to me while helping me stand up and walking out of the room.

Derek is looking through one of the windows, I walk up to him and Mark wants to try and stop me ''it's okay, I won't freak out I promise'' I assure them both.

Derek looks at me, this is the first time I've noticed how much he's apparently asking of himself. His eyes look hollow, and there're dark rims surrounding them.

''You're one of the greatest neurosurgeons in this entire country'' I start, ''this is not your fault, and I'm truly sorry I freaked out on you like that'' I say ashamed of myself, he just nods.

I take his face in my hands

''Dr Derek Sheppard this is NOT your fault! Do you hear me?'' he smiles at me now and places his hands over mine.

''I get used to it, you do know that the brain guy always gets the blame.'' I give him a huge hug and whisper in his ear ''thank you for saving my fiancées life'' I want to move away but he stops me ''we'll get her back Arizona. I just need you to be patient with her.''


	6. Chapter 6

**6**

**Arizona's POV  
**Mark has to push me into Callie's room

''Okay so these guys are actually McSteamy and McPerky?'' she asks Teddy laughing.  
''Yes, that'd be them'' Teddy says with a huge smile across her face.  
''I told her some hospital gossips'' she says while standing up.

''Oh good! So we can continue on the what's what and who's?'' Mark asks excited

''You're such a girl!'' Teddy teases him.

''But which one is which?'' Callie asks, her eyes locking with mine for a moment. ''Clearly I'm McSteamy since I'm gorgeous'' Mark tells her while sitting next to her bed. ''You don't hold a candle to Arizona Sloan'' Teddy defends me, giving him a light push.

She walks past me and gives my hand a quick squeeze ''you can do this'' she whispers in my ear before leaving the room.

I see Callie looking at my hand, she has this mischievous grin on her face.

''So you guys want to tell me why you where hitting McDreamy, and you were carrying her away?'' she asks curious ''no, not really'' Mark answers and the two fall in to a friendly conversation.

I stay at the background, trying to control myself and not run towards her to kiss her. She takes a few glances at me but doesn't really try to include me in the conversation.

''Ok so enough chit chat about where I'm from and what I apparently do'' she says after awhile. ''Let's talk dirt!'' she has this wicked smile on her face, my heart melts.

''What do you want to know?'' Mark asks.

''Why are you two here? I mean I know you're supposed to help me remember and all, but why did Dr Sheppard ask you two in particular? Did you do something? Or were you there when, you know the 'accident' happened?''

''Wow wow wow, slow down tiger'' Mark says.

''I know you don't remember this so it might seem weird but before this'' he pointed at the room and machines.

''We were friends. Pretty good ones as well'' he smiled proudly, ''oh and I live across the hall from your apartment'' he adds.

Callie's face twitched a bit, I couldn't really make out what she was thinking. It was silent for a really long time after that

''I'm sorry, it must be really hard talking to a friend who doesn't remember you'' she says quietly.

I feel sorry for her, she looks like she's going to cry and all I can think of is holding her in my arms and tell her that everything will be alright, but I can't.

''Thanks, but I'm sure you're going to remember me and the rest of us in no time! Especially Arizona over here, cause you know you guys are'' ''roommates'' I interrupt him.

He looks confused for a moment but recovers quickly ''yeah that's why she's here! I mean who knows your day to day life better then your own roommate right?''

**Callie's POV**

This Arizona didn't talk much, so when she quickly interrupted Mark it surprised me. Roommates? Maybe that's while I feel so at home with her. But she doesn't really look me in the eyes, why would that be? Did I do something to her before this happened? Or did she? I decide to ask these kind of question later on, when she feels a bit more comfortable around me.

''Ok so can you tell me something a bit more personal? Like do you have a boyfriend? Is it McDreamy?'' she was just taking a sip of water which she spit out in surprise.

That's what I thought, I knew I saw something with her and Dr Altman earlier on, I bet there's something between them. She looks up to me like I slapped her in the face, oeps wrong question I guess. It looks like she wants to leave again but Mark holds her down

''Derek?! No he's with Grey, they're married'' trying to get my attention off of Arizona.

''And then there's Owen, or as you might call him McArmy, he's married with Christina Yang, or McRobot. Now Yang and Grey are best friends, best friends forever and all that, we call them the twisted sisters. Meredith's actual sister Lexie, or Little Grey, is my wife and as I told you we live across your apartment.'' He starts to explain his relationship with Lexie to me, I see a hint of pride in his eyes.

''Then there's Karev and Stevens, they're married for 4 years now, give or take. She went away for almost 2 years but she got better and healthier and moved back in with Karev. They still live in Meredith's old house, she doesn't want to give it up'' he starts to ramble again.

''You should rest'' Arizona says out of the blue, she looks at Mark when she says this ''you've been talking to her non stop for almost 4 hours now'' she looks back at me, she looks worried.

''Oh I'm sorry! Roller girl's right you should rest! I'm going to check on Lexie and come back later alright?'' he says already leaving the room.

Arizona doesn't look amused at all, ''are you alright?'' I ask her when the door closes.

''Sometimes I just want to hit him with a brick'' she says, looking very cute with her eyebrows crunched together.

''So Arizona…. What kind of name is that?'' I ask her curiously.

She snaps out of her starring contest with the door.

''Uhm well…''

''If you don't want to tell me that's alright! I didn't mean to embarrass you or anything! It just it sounds so familiar.'' I tell her.

She grins a bit at this.

''Well first of all I'm not named after the state. But are you sure you want to hear this?'' she asks me while flipping through my chart.

''Of course!''

''I'm named after the battleship the U.S.S. Arizona. My grandfather served on that ship when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. He saved 19 men before he drowned…'' she says, and I can hear the pride in her voice.

''Wow! Now I'm really in love with your name you know that?!'' I say enthusiastic.

She clinched her fists for a second, or at least I thought she was cause her hands are folded now.

''A lot better then Callie, it's so common!'' I add.

She shifts a bit in her chair and looks really interested at the bed sheets.

''You have anything but a common name, you just make everyone call you Callie, but your name is beautiful if you ask me…'' she says a bit shy.

That look on her face is so adorable!

''Really? Tell me!''

She turns her head and looks me straight in my eyes for the first time. Her eyes are beautiful, they're like blue crystals, and I'm already drowning in them, gosh she's gorgeous!

''Calliope'' she says softly.


	7. Chapter 7

**7**

**Arizona's POV  
**The next few days were even more exhausting then before. Callie had visitors all the time, trying to help her remember anything. Most days I waited outside her room, waiting for her to fall asleep before returning back inside again. I feel selfish but I can't really talk to her yet, after the first time I looked her in to her eyes, I knew this was going to be even harder than waiting for her to wake up.

Carlos was now talking to her, he seemed to handle it a lot better than me. Well everyone was handling a lot better than me, even Calliope self. She was tired, and I could see the fear in her eyes but she always put on a brave face when somebody who claimed they knew her came into her room.

Her basic memory was coming back, for example she could tell Yang how she'd do a knee replacement. Christina questioned her everyday about at least one surgery, she would also show her x-rays or charts that she used to work on. She couldn't remember the patients or cases, but she could tell her what in her opinion the best course of treatment would be. Christina saw it as her personal duty to help Callie remember how to be a badass surgeon again.

The door closes and Carlos walks out with a small smile across his face.

''How is she sir?'' I ask him as I hand him a cup of coffee.

''You know you could ask her that yourself?'' he tells me.

I look away, he must be mad at me for not sitting next to her through all this. He lifts my chin up and gives me a warm smile

''Arizona I know this is hard on you, I really can't imagine how you must feel. So you do what you think is right for my Calliope. All I know that if she's going to come back it has to be with your help, she loves you so deeply Arizona, I've never seen that before. So if she's going to remember anything, it's going to be you.'' He says to me, tears escape my eyes.

''I can't handle this sir, she needs someone strong and I feel like a train rack!'' I blur out. Well done Arizona, this is the moment you start talking about your feelings, good timing Robbins, good timing. And I mentally kick myself.

''Dr Robbins'' his voice a bit more stern, this can't be good.

''You've once told me, you're a good man in a storm. I believed it back then and I still believe it today'' he gives me a big hug ''now I'll be back when you or Calliope needs me, but right now I'm not the one she needs'' he winks at me before he walks away.

**Callie's POV**

I see my father and Arizona talking in the hallway, they seem to know each other, that's nice. That way she could maybe tell me more about my relationship with him. I see Arizona leaving shortly after my father does. She doesn't come in to my room a lot when I'm awake, but when I wake up in the middle of the night she's always there, sleeping in a chair next to me. I can look at her for hours, she's so beautiful.  
I'm snapped out of my daydream when I hear the door open ''is he gone?'' Mark asks cautious.

''Who? My dad?''

''No the holy pope himself! Of course your dad!'' he says walking in to the room after making sure we are alone.

''What did you do to be scared of him?'' I ask while laughing a bit at his odd behavior.

''What did I do? Who says it's not him who just scares away all of your friends?'' he says pretending to be offended by this assumption.

''Because he and Arizona were talking and hugging outside my room a few minutes ago'' I tell him.

He doesn't seem surprised, he just smiles a bit sadly.

''Yeah, well she earned his respect a long time ago'' he says more to himself then to me.

''How? What did she do?'' I ask him excited, finally some more information on my mysterious guardian angel I think to myself.

''I'm not sure I'm the right person to tell you that'' he says.

I pout at him ''please?'' I ask him.

''Oh come on Cal that's just mean!'' He takes as deep breath ''all I'm going to say about this is that is that she stood up for ehm…. You, against your father. It worked, and ever since he likes her a lot. Now let's talk about something else'' he says.

She sounds so nice, I really want to get to know her. Mark starts talking about the hospital gossips and I quickly lose track of the conversation.

I'm trying really hard to remember stuff, but the more I try to more vaguely it gets.

''Is she dating G.I. Jane?'' I ask apparently out loud because Mark looks confused at me.

''What? No I told you April is dating what's his name, the scrub nurse. You have to pay attention Cal'' and he wants to continue his story but I interrupt him ''no not her! Arizona! Is Arizona dating Teddy?'' I ask him aware of the fact I'm holding my breath until he answers me.

He starts grinning ''ah so you want to know what's up with Arizona right?'' he has this grin spread across him face.

''You told me about everyone else'' I tell him, trying to sound nonchalant.

''Teddy's not into girls, at least I don't think she is. But they're best friends a bit like the twisted sister, only more mature and less twisted. It used to drive..'' but he stops talking.

''What?'' I ask him ''it used to drive what?'' I ask him again.

''Never mind, I told you before I'm not talking about Arizona. Now what do you want to eat?''

''I'm not hungry. Tell me more about myself then'' although I don't really know if I want to hear the answers.

''I've noticed that I used to wear a ring on my left hand, I can see the marks. Does this mean that I used to be engaged? Or am I still?'' I ask him.

''Cal are you sure you're up for this?'' he asks me, without looking me straight into my eyes.

''You're my best friend, you said so yourself. So you should be the one who tells me'' I demand an answer, I'm ready to know, or at least I think I am. He opens his mouth but decides against it

''Mark Sloan you better tell me right now!'' I all but yell at him.

''At least you sound like your old self again'' Arizona says while walking in to the room with a smile across her face.

''Now just add his middle name and you'll be the Calliope we all know and love'' she laughs at herself.

Mark looks a bit stunned in her direction and I can't make out this new vibe she's giving.

''Now does either one of you want to tell me what all that fuss was about?'' she asks looking between us.

''She, she thinks she was engaged because of the mark on her finger and she wants me to tell her about it'' Mark says, looking a bit guilty.

If Arizona was shocked because of this news she hid it well, ''well Calliope as your new main physician I say it won't do you any good talking about this'' ''but'' I want to interrupt her but she cuts me of.

''It's not up for discussion, so if you don't agree with me ask for another team leader. Although they wouldn't let you go home now'' she tells me with a dimpled smile, it's the first time I see her doing it, and I know I could get used to this feeling it gives me in my stomach.

''I…..I…..I….'' ''she can go home?!'' Mark finishes for me.

''You most certainly can! So let's pack your bags and leave this awful room.'' She says in a cheery voice.

''How did you get Webber to sign off on this?'' Mark asks her ''well she does live in the same apartment as me Mark. And I happen to be a super awesome surgeon, if I may say so myself'' she winks at me.

The weird thing that happened earlier in my stomach is doing it again, only now in tenfold.

''Uhuhm'' Mark clears his throat ''and of course Lexipedia and you aren't that bad'' she says playfully to him.


	8. Chapter 8

**8**

**Arizona's POV  
**The conversation with Mr. Torres lighted the fire in my heart again, as soon as he left I went to go look for Teddy.  
''I'm taking her home! And I need you to help me get the apartment ready'' I told her in my excited cheery voice.

''What?'' she replied in disbelief, so I told her my plan to get Calliope out of the hospital and in to our home, ''it's going to help her remember Ted! I just have to make sure that there isn't a single picture of us in the apartment, it'd shock her to know that we were a couple.''

''Are, you are a couple Zona you guys technically never broke up'' she told me.

I didn't want to go in to that so mumbled something and she didn't push it. She reasoned with me that I should be the one going home and getting everything ready and that she should be the one convincing Derek and the chief to discharge Callie.

''Super! Thanks a million Teddy!'' I give her a hug and walk towards the exit ''this is going to work I just know it!'' I say to her before turning the corner.

At the apartment I make sure that all of my clothes are in the spare room and I put a fresh set of linen on the bed to make sure the room doesn't smell too much like me. After that I take all the pictures with just the two of us down and put them in a box which I put underneath what I guess is my bed now. I text Lexie with a grocery list, asking her if she'd get it for me.

''I'm on it!'' I hear her yell from the hallway. I pick out an outfit that I know she'll like and take my time under the shower. When I'm putting on some make up I hear Lexie walking in

''Dr Robbins?'' ''in here'' I answer her.

''How many times have I told you to call me Arizona when we're not inside the hospital Lexie?!''

''Sorry, old habit I guess. Mer told me you were taking Callie home tonight?'' she says, beaming with joy.

Why doesn't anyone call her McPerky? She's joyful as well, I think to myself.

''Don't get your hopes up little Grey, she still hasn't got a clue who she is. But I'm hoping that this will make it easier on her.''

''I'm glad to see you smile again Arizona…'' she says

''I know, I am too, now how do I look?'' I ask her turning around in front of her ''awesome!'' she winks at me ''couldn't have said it better myself Dr Grey!'' I give her a quick hug.

''Now you should take Mark out tonight! God knows it's been forever since you two did something nice together!''

''But''

''No 'buts' Lexie! You guys deserve it, Teddy and I will handle things here with Callie, now 'shoo'! And put on something nice for your husband!'' she thanks me and rushes back to her own apartment.

I take one last look at the place before I set of towards Calliope.

**Callie's POV  
**Arizona insisted on pushing me in a wheelchair through the hospital, but at the exit I stopped her.

''Okay enough with the wheelchair race, someone's going to get hurt!'' Arizona and Mark stopped abruptly which costs Teddy to fall out of the wheelchair that Mark was pushing.

We all burst out in laughter, I don't think I've laughed this hard since, since forever! It took us a while to pull ourselves together but Arizona and Mark finally helped me out of the wheelchair. Teddy supported me, and the first step I take outside the hospital I take in a deep breath of fresh air.

''God this feels good!'' I say as we walk across the street.

I hear Mark and Arizona talking in hushed voices behind me.

''What got you all rainbowy and butterflies again?'' Mark asks her ''Mr. Torres reminded me of a promise I made him years ago'' Arizona whispers back to him.

''This is how she always is, not the shy avoiding person you know her to be from the last few weeks.'' Teddy interrupts my train of thought, I look at her questionably ''Arizona'' she answers my unspoken question.

''This is the reason she's called McPerky. She's like this all the time.'' I laugh at her comment. ''Oh you laugh now, but it will get annoying I warn you!'' she teases.

''I doubt that'' I say more to myself then to her, when I look back at her I see dimples forming, she winks at me and quickly turns her head towards Mark again. Am I blushing? I hope nobody noticed.

''Home sweet home!'' Mark says after we walk out of an elevator.

We stop in front of a blue door and Arizona hands me over a key ''will you do the honors?'' she jokes.

''The second room on the right is yours, we'll give you a minute.''

She says and they walk into another apartment across this one, I guess that's Mark and Lexie's then.

I slowly open the door, a few lights are on and candles are lit. It smells lovely in here, like vanilla mixed with coconut oil. It soothes me and gives me the courage to explore further. I walk into the second room on the right and find myself standing in a huge bedroom, it's darker in here than in the rest of the apartment, purple and black are the main colors. I find myself liking the color combination. I open the closet and see that one side is empty, that's weird. But I guess the rest of my clothes are probably in my bag from the hospital. As I explore the room further I see a picture frame, I recognize the man as my father so I guess the other two women are my mother and sister. In the living room I stumble onto more pictures, a lot of them are with people I recognize from the hospital. I look for a picture with me and someone else, like maybe the person who gave me a ring I'm not wearing anymore. As I look at a picture of Arizona sitting on a bench in a park, I feel the 'things' in my stomach partying again.

I hear a loud knock on the front door and quickly put back the frame before opening the door.

''I just wanted to check if you were alright'' Arizona says with a smile across her face, I blush because I feel like a child caught doing something they shouldn't.

''Can I come in?'' she asks, and there are the dimples again!

I feel my blush deepen and quickly step aside and avoid her gaze ''of course of course!''

''So does it feel being here?'' she asks while hanging up her coat.

Those jeans hug her ass perfectly, she's hot! I think she caught me checking her out so I quickly walk in the kitchen to cover my continuing blush.

''It's weird because it feels familiar, but it seems out of place… I don't know I just don't recognize it'' ''yet'' she adds. ''You don't recognize it yet. Want to have a drink?'' she asks, ''uhm, sure.''

She looks at me with this huge smile across her face, she's making my heart pound to unhealthy rates. She gives me a glass of red wine and takes white herself, she pulls a chair next to mine and raises her glass.

''To it feels familiar but I don't recognize it yet!'' I laugh and we both take a sip.

''I ordered food, I hope that's okay?''

''Sure'' I answer her and it's silent for a while, but it's okay, it's a comfortable silence.

''Arizona?''

I look at the pictures that seem to be everywhere in the apartment

''Yeah'' she answers absentmindedly.

''Can you tell me'' but at that moment the doorbell rang, she got up and walked towards the door ''ah! Saved by the bell'' she smiles before handing some cash to the delivery boy.

During diner we chat about the hospital and the work I used to do there.

''Do you think I'll be able to work again?'' I ask her in a more serious tone, she takes another sip of wine before answering me.

''You'll have to get a clearing from two different Neurologist, that is when you remember everything'' she explains.

''What if'' I begin but she interrupts me

''IF and this is really 'glass half empty' Calliope, but IF you don't you have to take a few exams. But let's worry about that when we have to okay?'' she squeezes my hand and returns to her glass of wine.

She's so joyful and sweet, and her squeezing my hand sends sparks all the way up my arm. Did she notice that as well? But she's right, don't worry now when for all I know I wake up tomorrow with my memory intact.


	9. Chapter 9

**9**

3 weeks later

**Arizona's POV  
**I give her some towels ''if you need anything just say the word'' I wink at her, our bodies are dangerously close to each other so I excuse myself and walk towards the living room.

My heart rate is still elevated when Teddy walks in, I think I'm blushing because she looks at me with this evil smile upon her face. ''How is she?''

''I can't keep this up Ted!'' I whisper to her ''what if she doesn't remember? I can't live here with her without her knowing what she means to me!'' I say as I walk to the fridge to poor myself a glass of wine.

''Give her time Zona, she'll get there. Now hand me over that bottle of tequila I'm exhausted!'' at that same moment the front door opens.

''Did anyone say tequila?'' Yang says while rushing in with her own bottle.

''Do you have some sort of tequila-radar Yang?'' I ask her amazed by her sudden appearance.

''As a matter of fact I do, now hand me over the salt'' she asks while taking the seat next to Teddy at the bar. ''You were amazing back there doctor Altman!'' she beams in awe at Teddy, who smiles a bit but then raises her shot glass.

''To scalpels and sex!''

''Hear hear!'' Yang replies.

''I haven't had either one in almost 10 weeks'' I pout.

''Ah! And all this time I thought that those two things were your main reason to be so freaking happy all the time'' Yang points at me while taking another shot.

''What **are** the reasons she's so happy all the time?'' Calliope asks walking in the room, trying to sound innocent but I know that look in her eyes, even if she doesn't realize it. I give her a shot glass and try to avoid eye contact.

''S and S Cal!'' Yang practically yells at her ''Roller girl over here hasn't done or had either one in 10 weeks! I was pointing out that I find it strange that she's still so McPerky'' she empties the first bottle after that note.

I quickly grab the second and hold it to my mouth.

''S and S?'' she asks.

''Scalpels and Sex!'' Teddy yells out and I spit out the liquor that was still in my mouth. ''But don't worry Zona! I haven't had sex in a really long time as well!'' and both she and Christina laugh hysterically at this point.

Callie shrugs her shoulders at this ''I'm a virgin'' she says nonchalant while taking another shot.

''What?!'' Christina now yells in her ear.

''I mean I'm sure I did S and S you call it? Before but not since I awoke from my coma, and I really can't remember doing it before so that kind of makes me a virgin I guess''

''Trust me Callie, you hade lots and lots and LOTS of sex!'' Christina assures her.

''And how would you know that?'' she asks her.

''Because I was you roommate! And trust me when I say these walls are thin. And before you kicked me out you were going at it like bunny's with''

''Oh god Yang shut up!'' Everyone looks at me but before I can say anything Yang interrupts me.

''See! I told you! You need to get some sex or do some surgeries again, because you can't be your perky-butterfly-rainbowy self without them!'' she looks satisfied at her discovery.

''She's kind of right you know'' Teddy adds, I shoot daggers with my eyes in her direction but she ignores me completely. ''No I mean it Zona!'' she continues ''you're one of the best pediatric surgeons in the country and your head of the department, you can't hide in here forever!'' she blurs out, and the moment she's finished I can see she regrets it.

I get up and walk towards 'my bedroom'. Teddy follows me ''Zona'' ''Don't'' I hiss at her before shoving her out of the way to continue to walk towards 'my bedroom'.

''Zona stop! Come on we can talk about this'' she says while standing in front of the door.

''What?'' I yell at her ''what do you want me to say? No suggestions? Christina maybe?'' I look the young surgeon straight in to her eyes before turning my attention to Teddy again. ''Do you want me to stop trying? To move on? To go to work tomorrow and pretend it never happened?''

Mark walks in at this point ''what'' but Lexie put her hand over his mouth.

''Well I can't! I can't go to that freaking hospital tomorrow because to me that means starting over. Moving on… And I don't want to move on! She's still… And you don't want me to give up either! So make up your mind! Choose for me then if you know it better then me!'' I feel like a bull and Teddy and Yang are red flags that I just have to run in to.

''We're not asking you to make a decision Arizona'' Teddy begins.

''Yeah, you know there's still hope'' Yang adds.

''Well I guess I should thank you for understanding how it feels then'' I sarcastically reply.

''We're here with you'' Teddy says

''We understand, I'm sorry'' Yang says.

''Don't you **dare** tell me you understand! I lost the love of my life and all you care about are scalpels and sex!'' I rush pass Mark and Lexie and run out of the building.

That's it, after 9 weeks, 6 days and two hours I finally lost it.

**Callie's POV  
**She lost the love of her life? What?! When?! And why didn't anyone bother to tell me about this? I get up to follow her but Teddy holds me back, ''I got this'' she says before grabbing Arizona's keys and running out.

''I'll get you home'' Lexie says to Christina, who walks behind her but she turns at the door.

''I'm sorry you had to see that'' she says before walking out after Lexie.

Mark closes the door behind them and looks at me, ''now you've witnessed the effect of tequila on some people are you still up for another shot?'' he looks in some cabinets and returns with a new bottle.

''Secret stash!'' he says while handing me over a shot glass, which I downed quickly.

''She….she lost her boyfriend? How?'' I ask him. He seems to be considering what to tell me.

''An accident, they protected her when some men where trying to attack her. They were engaged'' he took two shots in a row. ''Now, I'm not telling you anymore about this. So you want to hang out with Lexie and me tonight? Give these so called 'grown ups' some time to them selves?'' he wasn't really asking me, and I understood it would probably be best if I wasn't here when she came home, I can't be of much help since I don't remember anything.

All I want to do is hold her though, and tell her everything will be alright. But I grabbed some stuff from my room and followed Mark to his apartment, but not before scribbling down something on a piece of paper.

**Arizona's POV  
**I ran as fast as I could, but Teddy being G.I. Jane and all caught up with me soon enough. Of course it's Seattle so it started raining, great! Just freaking great! I thought to myself, still running even though Teddy was running next to me. We didn't say anything to each other, we just kept running. We ran longer then our usual morning round, longer then I think I've ever ran before, I ran until my ribs started hurting and then started to run even faster. After at least an hour and a half of non stop hardcore running I had to stop because I couldn't breathe anymore, the moment I stopped I threw up all over the sidewalk. I sit down, totally soaked from my own sweat and the rain.

''You were right'' I begin after waiting a couple of minutes to catch my breath.

''But also very wrong'' she adds. ''I'm sorry for what I said, and implied the last few weeks'' she says.

''I'm sorry too'' I tell her.

She puts her arm over my shoulder and I start to cry.

''I've missed you so much!'' I try telling her in between sobs. ''And then you come back, and this happened and… and, and everything is so fucked up!'' I tell her, she doesn't answer me she just holds me while I cry my eyes out on her already wet shirt.

We take a cab back to my apartment, she supports me as we walk towards my door. When we come in she helps me under the shower. She helps me in my PJ's and tells me to go to bed.

''She's staying at Mark's tonight'' she whispers to me while laying next to me in my bed. She hugs me tightly ''thank you'' I say to her. She hugs me ever more tightly ''you were there for me too'' she replies.

When I feel that she's asleep I grab a picture from the draw of my nightstand. It's the picture we made after we got engaged, she's kissing me and I'm smiling in the camera, both showing off our rings. It's one of my most favorite pictures, it reminds me of how lucky I once was. I kiss the picture and held it to my heart, hoping I'd fall asleep rather sooner then later.

**Callie's POV  
**When I wake up early next morning I go back to my own apartment, I wanted to go shopping but I forgot my purse yesterday. The apartment looks the same as I left it yesterday evening, I start cleaning it as quietly as possible, it's the least I can do. I hear some movement coming out from her room, I peek inside and see Teddy holding Arizona while looking at some pictures. The moment she realizes I'm there she puts the pictures away so I can't see them.

''Is she still asleep?'' she whispers at me. I nod my head 'yes' she looks beautiful, tired, but really pretty, like sleeping beauty.

''Is she alright?'' I ask her in the same hushed tone

''She will be'' she answers me.

I take look at Arizona one last time before walking out, something about those pictures Teddy was looking at was really off. I didn't get a good look at them but I saw Arizona kissing someone else's hand, but judging by the sight of that huge engagement ring I'd swear it was a woman's hand she was kissing.


	10. Chapter 10

**10**

**Arizona's POV  
**I woke up to the smell of coffee, I slowly open my eyes to see Teddy sitting in front of me with a steaming cup.  
''Mine, I hope'' I ask her but don't await her answer and quickly take a few sips of the delicious beverage

''Good morning to you too'' she smirks. ''How do you feel?''

''Like I just ran the New York marathon! What on earth did I do yesterday?''

''You don't remember?'' she asks surprised, and then it all comes back to me, I acted like a complete fool, I take a few more sips of my sacred liquid.

''We're okay?'' Teddy asks me with a worried look on her face I punch her in her arm. ''Of course we're okay silly!'' she looks at me relieved.

''What time is it?''

''Almost 1 pm you sleepyhead!'' she teases.

''Why on earth did you let me drink this much?'' I whine.

''You know the drill Robbins'' she says all G. like.

''What?'' I ask her innocent, she gives me a look I know all to well ''no fair! You've been awake much longer then I have!'' I complain.

''Tell it to the pope, now you have 30 minutes, I'll meet you outside'' she gives me a kiss on my forehead before leaving. ''Oh and Zona'' she says while standing at the door ''Callie stopped by this morning and cleaned all the mess. She looked worried over you, just so you know'' and with that she walks away.

This is good news right? She isn't scared of by my tirade of last night. I quickly down my coffee and jump into the shower. After 28 minutes I'm ready to walk out the door, but I stop at the fridge as I see a very familiar handwriting. I take the note of the fridge and read.

''_Dear Arizona, I hope you're alright. I'm going to stay at Mark's tonight, not because I don't want to see you, because I do! I really do… But because I figured you'd be needing some space. In case you need anything I'm just across the hall =D –xo- C''_

I read the note a few times before I take down the other one.

''_Good morning sleepyhead! Guess what? I'm going shopping today and I'm taking the Grey's with me!''_ I laugh at the image of how that must go. ''_I hope you've slept well, you looked really cute drawling all over Teddy ;D JK! See you at dinner (?) –XO- C''_

The butterflies are back in full force as I fold the notes and put them in my bottom draw of my nightstand. When I look at my alarm clock I see that I'm already 2 minutes late, oh Ted's going to kill me! I grab my keys and run down the stairs taking two at a time. When I walk out I see Teddy talking to, what? Oh hell no! What on earth? Teddy sees me and at the same time the other woman turns around.

''Arizona, long time no see. How are you holding up?'' she asks trying to sound friendly and caring.

''She's out'' I tell her my voice spits poison at her, I hope she notices.

''Oh well I guess I can stop by later then'' she's not even trying to hide her disappointment. ''So you are''

''Yes we are'' I interrupt her. ''I mean she hasn't recovered her memory yet, but we got engaged a while ago'' I say in defense.

''I see, well I guess I'll see you later then'' she wants to walk away but I stop her.

''Wait!'' she turns around with an evil smile upon her face ''what the hell are you doing here Erica?''

**Callie's POV  
**I see a blonde haired woman talking to Teddy and Arizona just outside our apartment building.  
''Who's that?'' I ask Yang who joined us at lunchtime.

She looks up and stops dead in her tracks, causing Meredith to walk in to her.  
''He! What's that the…?'' she asks while picking up some of the bags she dropped.

The commotion causes Arizona to turn around and she spots us. She looks, angry? Why would she be angry? Is this about last night? The other two blondes see us as well, the unknown woman walks up to me, but before she can say anything Yang steps in front of me.

''Don't'' she tells the stranger.

''Yang you can't decide what I can or can not do, now step aside'' the blonde tells her in a very stern voice.

''Look that's where you're wrong Dr. Hahn. You don't get to drill me anymore, so I will most certainly not let you treat me like that. Now move along'' she waves her off.

But the blonde shoved her out of the way and stretches out her hand towards me

''Erica Hahn, I'm sorry to hear what happened to you.''

I look in Arizona's direction, she and Teddy joined us. She looks angry and hurt but she gives me a small smile, I guess that's my queue.

''Hi nice to meet you'' I shake her hand politely.

''Yeah we used to be uhm, friends'' and she gives Arizona a strange look I can't place. ''Maybe we can talk some time?'' she asks me.

''We'll see about that. Now if you don't mind we have plans, come on Callie'' and Christina drags me towards the building.

''Who's that woman?'' I ask her once we're inside.

''Don't get her started'' Meredith says while making us some coffee.

''That's a former colleague of ours'' Lexie says.

And then Christina starts explaining that Erica used to be head of the Cardio department and how she treated Christina. She went on for over an hour, I guess she's still really pissed at her.

''I can't believe I used to be friends with someone who treated you like that'' I say.

Everyone fell silent, I hate not knowing what kind of apparently weird thing I say.

''More coffee?'' Lexie asks us nervously.

''Well yeah, what are you going to do about it. Anyway she left very suddenly'' Meredith says.

''And I couldn't care less'' Christina adds.

Meredith gives her a weird look

''What?'' she replies all innocent. ''I'm really glad she left! Otherwise Dr Altman wouldn't have come here and she's the best teacher I've ever had!'' she says all proudly.

''You wouldn't be talking about me now would you Yang?'' Teddy asks while she and Arizona step inside the apartment.

I can't help but stare at Arizona, she's all covered in sweat, God! She looks really hot! She catches me looking at her and gives me a knowing look before winking at me. I start blushing furiously and turn my head quickly in the hope she didn't catch that.

''I'm going to take a shower, you want to have a girls night in?'' she asks us.

''We don't do girls nights'' Meredith says standing up and dragging a still blushing Christina with her.

''Dr Altman I…'' but Meredith cuts her of ''she meant every word of it Dr Altman'' she says before leaving the apartment, dragging Christina with her.

Teddy laughs at this ''can I use your shower Callie?'' ''of course!'' I say and suddenly I'm left alone with Lexie.

''Come over here'' she says standing in the kitchen. ''Do you remember how to cook?'' she asks me when I joined her.

''I don't know, I've only made breakfast since I came home'' I reply honestly.

''Well you used to be able to cook really lovely and luckily for me you thought me how to make your famous 'chicken picata''' she says while looking for some ingredients.

So Lexie and I start making this so called famous dish of mine. It goes really well actually, I don't remember what goes in and when but the smell of it is familiar, and that's a good sign, I hope. Teddy comes out of the shower and excuses herself ''sorry I have to check in on a patient of mine, safe me some?'' she asks while running out.

''You know everyone is really stressed out at the moment'' Lexie starts.

''Why's that?'' I ask her.

''The senior residents are applying for a specialty at the moment so they're doing everything to impress the attendings. And the attendings have to write them reviews and in order to do that they have to check almost everything they do. It's like the merger all over again if you ask me'' she rambles, but I think I got it.

''Has everyone chosen their specialty yet?'' I ask

''I guess so'' she begins. ''I mean Christina breathes Cardio, it's been that way ever since I first met her. And Meredith's really good at General Surgery, although I think she thinks she owes it to our mother to try and get a spot at Neurosurgery. Which would be weird since her husband is the head of that department. And then you have Karev, who's surprisingly good at Pediatric surgery, he has Arizona to thank for that. She believed in him from the get go and put a great deal of effort and energy into training him. He misses her, I mean he would never admit it but I can tell.''

She takes a deep breath of air before continuing, this woman can really talk I think to myself. ''April wants to apply to Neurosurgery, but I think that's more because of Derek. She's actually pretty good as a plastic surgery resident Mark told me, so I really hope she applies there instead. And then there's Jackson….'' she fell silent.

''What's up with him?'' I ask.

''I don't know which specialty he's going to chose, but given the circumstances I guess it's going to be Trauma surgery.'' She answers whilst avoiding eye contact. Mark walks in at that moment

''Ah! Two of my most favorite girls!'' he says smiling and giving Lexie a kiss.

''I'd love to stay and chat but Lexie and I have plans. Catch up with you tomorrow?'' he asks while giving me a hug.

''Sure have fun'' I smile at them, Lexie looks confused but followed Mark.

And now I'm left alone, I feel miserable, it's been five weeks since I woke up from my coma and I still can't remember a single thing. It's so damn frustrating! I talked about this with Derek, he's sure that it's going to come back to me eventually, he just doesn't know when. He says it's a good sign that I remember little things, like the smell of the apartment and how to do certain surgeries. He says that's the reason, together with the fact that my basic memory is in tact, that he believes it'll all come back. The doorbell gets me out of my thoughts, when I open it I see Erica standing in front of me.

''Hi am I interrupting anything?'' she asks friendly.

''No, I was just trying to remember how to cook'' I answer her honestly.

She stands in the doorway, waiting for me to invite her in I guess. I'm just so exhausted that I couldn't be bothered to invite her inside, and I'm not really sure it'll cheer Arizona up, the two seem to have some kind of history together.

''Do you mind talking a bit?'' she asks shyly.

''Sure'' I answer her before really giving it a thought.

I'm in desperate need for some company and I guess Arizona wouldn't mind a night to herself.

''Let me just grab some stuff and I'll meet you downstairs okay?''

''Okay'' she smiles at me before walking towards the elevator.

Her smile reminds me of something, although I'm not sure of what. It gives me a good feeling though. I quickly turn out the oven and grab my purse, I hear that Arizona's still in the shower so I write her a note and head out.

**Arizona's POV  
**I took my time in the shower, I had to try and wash away my encounter with Erica earlier this day. When Callie was dragged inside the building I started running, didn't even say goodbye to her. When I came home most of my anger was gone. To see Callie checking me out was weird to say at the least, I mean she checked me out before but not like that. And the fact that I couldn't act on it was just too frustrating. I know, I have to give her more time, be more patient with her. But my patience was almost gone and I didn't know how long I could stand this anymore.

When I finally walk into the living room again I see that everyone's gone. They wouldn't leave me here without saying goodbye would they? And then I see the note, the note that will soon be known as the most evil note of mankind.

_''Hi Arizona, Erica stopped by and I thought you could use some time alone so I'm going out with her. Have a nice Callie-free evening! ;D –xo- C''_

I slide down on the ground, feeling my heart shatter in to a thousand pieces.


	11. Chapter 11

**11**

**Callie's POV  
**Erica took me to a very nice looking restaurant downtown. I didn't really say much, she kept talking about herself and her career. She ordered for me.  
''Trust me you're going to love it'' she says to me.

How does she know that? Have we been here before? She has this strange look on her face ''we've been here a couple of times when I still lived here'' she says gently. Good thing she seems to be able to read my mind.

''When did you move away?'' I ask her.

''Oh that seems like a million years ago… But I guess it's about four, four and half, years ago'' she says.

''Oh'' I reply a bit disappointed.

''You look disappointed'' she says.

''Well yeah, I thought that you were maybe able to tell me more about my life here, and my engagement. Nobody else seems to want to tell me about that last one'' I tell her while taking a few sips of wine.

It's silent for a while, Erica seems to be in a whole other world, she just stares at her glass. The waiter joins us with our salads ''Enjoy your meal'' I say to her before digging in myself. We eat in silence, it's a bit uncomfortable.

''What do you remember?'' she asks when our plates are taken away.

''That's just it, I can remember basic stuff, and when Christina asks me about a surgery I can tell her everything form the first incision to the last stitch. But I don't seem to remember people. And then there's the 'accident' as they all call it, I do remember one part of it vaguely but it's blurry. And I don't even know if that's a memory of the 'accident' in the first place because nobody wants to tell me what really happened. Do you know?'' I ask her, hoping she'll tell me.

''I don't think everyone'll agree with me telling you this, and for the record you practically kicked it out of me'' she winks at me.

Again it gives me a weird familiar feeling, just like her smile. She takes a few sips of wine before continuing.

''This is what I know A… I mean your fiancée was being harassed and you wanted to help h… ehm 'them' and then you got stabbed a couple of times before hitting your head on the side walk or something, the rest you know.''

She finishes her glass and orders another one. What she tells me doesn't seem right though, in my memory there where guys and they where trying to se… I was lying on the ground and I got up to help her… her? I knew it! I knew I was gay! I smile to myself. The main coarse arrived, Erica got me the tuna and it was alright I guess. I decided to test my memory.

''Do you know where he is? My fiancée I mean'' I add the last part when she gives me a confused look.

Luckily she just swallowed her sip of wine because it looks like she was choking, I hand her over a glass of water.

''Okay let me help you with that right now honey'' she says after regaining control of her laughter again. ''You're gay, or bisexual or something so don't assume your fiancé's a guy'' she says to me with an amused smile upon her face.

''I didn't, I just wanted to check. But do you want to tell me to whom I was engaged?'' I ask her.

''Not my place'' she says.

''Then at least tell me if it's a guy or a girl!'' and I'm a few seconds away from pouting.

''Nope, listen to me Callie. You'll remember it all on your own. If we tell you these kind of things who's to say we'll tell you the truth? Some people might take advantage of you, and tell you I don't know… that they're your partner or that you owe them money or something. There's a really good reason why people don't tell you too much about yourself, you just have to be more patient okay honey?'' she says to me and finishes another glass of wine.

Is she right? Should I just wait for my memory to come back to me? But I deserved to know to who I was engaged to right?

''Don't I deserve to know with whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with?'' I ask her.

''And if I tell you will you love that person automatically then? And if so will you love 'them' because I told you? Or because you were engaged? Who's to say that it will come back to you when I tell you?'' she asks me.

Crap! She's right! I would never know if I truly loved 'them' or if I did because I was supposed to. And what if I don't like them at all? No she's right, I don't want to be told, I want to remember on my own.

**Arizona's POV  
**I couldn't get up, I didn't want to get up either when somebody knocked on the door. After a while Mark came in using his copy of the key ''I thought I heard somebody cry'' he says to me while sitting down next to me.

''What's wrong?'' I hear he's concerned.

So I give him the most-evil-note-mankind-has-ever-known.

''She did what?'' Mark practically yells. ''Lexie told me Hahn stopped by earlier, that evil wicked witch!'' he stands up and starts pacing the room. ''What does she thinks she's doing? Doesn't she live in Boston now a days? I'll kick her back there if I have to!'' and he went on like that for another five minutes or so. ''Don't worry Arizona, I got your back!'' he concludes.

''Could you hand me over my phone?'' I ask him.

''Good idea! Call her and tell her to back the hell of!'' he says while handing me over my phone.

''I'm calling the chief and tell him I'm starting work again tomorrow'' I tell him.

''You told us you didn't want to start work because to you that meant moving on, starting your life without her or something like that'' he says confused while sitting down in front of me.

''I know what I said Mark, I meant it, and I still do'' I say with tears in my eyes.

''Then why on earth would you tell the chief that you'd go back to work tomorrow?''

''I'm not discussing this Mark'' and I want to dial the number but Mark grabs my phone

''You **are** discussing this with me!''

''I don't want your opinion Mark'' I tell him in a soft tone.

''I don't care! You promised me you wouldn't leave her! You said 'yes' when she asked you to marry her! So you are going to give me a damn good reason why you're leaving her!'' he practically yells at me.

''She doesn't know I exists Mark'' I say quietly. ''She's out on some sort of date, with a woman that hurt her badly in the past and she's probably having a good time. I can't tell her because she has to find out on her own… She awoke from her coma almost 6 weeks ago Mark I can't tell her who she can or can not go out with, she's a grown woman who in her opinion is single cause her fiancée is nowhere to be found'' he wipes away a few tears from my face before I continue. ''I can't tell her how much she means to me Mark, and I can't tell her to stop living her life. And that's why I have to let her go. I have to try and forget about the past and start focusing on the future, just like she's doing.'' I tell him this in a quiet and peaceful voice he has to understand why I'm doing this.

He stares at me and then back to the note, it's quiet for a long time.

''You should take her out on a date'' he offers hopeful.

''No I can't, I can't be around her without wanting to touch her, if I go out on a 'date' with her I'm almost certain something will happen''

''But that's good!'' Mark cuts me off ''I'll bet you the moment you guys hit it off she'll remember everything!''

''And what if she doesn't?'' I interject him. ''What if we 'hit it of' and she still doesn't remember squad? How am I supposed to 'date' my fiancée when she thinks we're going out on our first date?''

''But you don't know what'll happen unless you try!'' Mark pushes.

''Mark I'll always wait for her… You know that, but I have to try and let her live her own life''

''Just try it!'' he's getting mad, I can see it in his eyes.

I take my phone and scroll down to the right number, after a few rings the other person picks up the phone ''Hi it's Arizona, I'd like to start work again tomorrow.''


	12. Chapter 12

**12**

**Callie's POV  
**Erica walks up to my front door with me, she's clinging on to me and constantly flirting. It's kind of nice, I mean she's attractive and really nice to me, but something holds me back and it's not my unknown fiancée, it's the beautiful blonde on the other side of this door. Nothing has happened between the two of us or anything, I'm not even sure she likes me in that way. But she's so incredibly beautiful and nice and sweet I can't keep my mind off of her.

''So what do you say?'' Erica asks me.

I don't have a clue what she's talking about ''shall we discuss this inside?'' I say to her, she doesn't look surprised so I guess it's a good answer.

When we walk inside I see Mark sitting on the couch, watching television with Arizona asleep on his lap. He turns around to face us and gets up slowly, trying not to wake Arizona.

''What on earth is she doing here?'' he asks me, he sounds pissed off.

I want to answer him but he cuts me off ''let's discuss this outside before Arizona wakes up'' and he's already pushing us outside the apartment.

''Nice to see you again Sloan'' Erica says to him.

''I can't say the same to you'' he snaps back at her.

''Mark! What the hell is wrong with you?'' I ask him confused why he's acting like this.

''I could ask you the same thing! And aren't you supposed to be in Boston?'' he asks Erica.

''When I heard what happened to Callie I came over as quickly as I could.'' She tells him with a drunken smile on her face.

''Funny that you showed up when she was already home''

''Listen Sloan!'' Erica begins but I interrupt them.

''What the hell is wrong with you Mark? Erica was being really nice to me, we talked, we used to be friends you know'' I tell him.

''That sounds like a date to me, and believe me it's been a **long** time since you two were friends'' he tells me, I almost don't recognize him, he looks so incredibly mad it scares me a bit.

''And what's it to you Sloan if we were on a date? I heard you were married now a days, so this is really none of your concern'' Erica tells him.

Just as Mark wants to answer her Lexie comes walking out of their apartment, ''let them be honey'' she tells him while gently guiding him back home.

''You better know what you're doing to'' ''Mark come on!'' Lexie interrupts him and comes back outside to push him inside.

Before walking in he turns around and faces Erica ''you better hope she's here the next time I run into you Hahn, cause I swear to god I''

''Mark David Sloan! You better not end that sentence if you know what's good for you! Get your ass inside right now!'' Lexie yells at him. ''I'm sorry for this Callie, you should really talk to him about this tomorrow or something'' she tells me in a gentle voice before closing the door.

I stare at the closed door for a while ''can I use your bathroom?'' Erica asks me ''uhm yeah sure'' I tell her while opening the door again.

Arizona's still sound asleep on the couch, she's even more beautiful now. I get her a blanket and tuck her in, she mumbles something about chickens with a smile on her face. She's adorable, I place a kiss on her forehead before going in to my bedroom. I find Erica knocked out on my bed, what the hell. I think to myself, I think I saw a sleeping bag here somewhere. When I find it I shake her until she's awake.

''Here you have a shirt you can sleep in, and a sleeping bag'' I tell her before turning around and changing myself, she mumbles a thanks and walks into the bathroom to change. By the time she gets back I'm already asleep.

**Arizona's POV  
**I wake up at the sound of my phone, I guess I set my alarm on it yesterday. My body's a bit sore from laying on the couch all night, I smile as I remember my dream. Callie and I were living on a farm, she was playing with the goat together with a little raven haired girl with blue eyes. The blonde little boy was chasing the chickens and telling me to come and join him. I shake my head and come back to reality, I'm going to need a lot of coffee. I get up to put the coffee machine on before taking a quick shower. I'm actually excited to get back to work, it's been ten weeks since I last hold a scalpel. I had a good talk with Mark yesterday, he told me it doesn't have to be 'the end' for me and Calliope if I start work again. Maybe if I tell her about my day as a surgeon she'll remember again. I eat some cereal and drink my second cup of coffee, I scribble down something on a piece of paper for Calliope when her bedroom door opens. I look up and let my coffee cup fall down onto the ground in shock.

''Good morning to you too'' Erica says to me, she's wearing Callie's favorite collage shirt. I probably look like a goldfish right now, my mouth opens and closes but nothing comes out.

''What… what are you doing here?'' I ask her although I'm pretty sure I don't want to know the answer to that question.

''Not that's any of your business but I spend the night with Callie'' she has this evil grin on her face.

I grab my stuff and slam the front door shut behind me, running towards the hospital. How could she think that Callie and her were ever going to be okay again? It's over, it really is over now… I shake my head, I can't think about that, I have to safe tiny humans.


	13. Chapter 13

**13**

2 weeks later

**Arizona's POV  
**The days went by really fast, I put in extra hours in the clinic and got back to my research which I started a few months ago. Most nights I stayed at the hospital, the days I did go home I made sure that Callie wasn't home. Lexie or Mark made sure to check that before I went in. I looked at the clock and saw it was already 2.30 am, my next shift started at 7 am so I figured this was a good excuse to yet again sleep in an on call room. I didn't want to talk to anyone about anything especially not to Callie, but when I woke up the next morning I know I have to break my new rule. For the past few days I had these immense painfully cramps in my abdomen and heavy blood loss, when I wake up this morning the pain had doubled so I know I had to find Addison and let her examine me.

When I see her I grab her and pull her into an exam room.

''Give me something because my uterus is killing me!'' I tell her.

''Ah pms?'' she has a knowing look on her face.

''No, at least I don't think so, it hasn't been this bad since… since forever! I mean I have blood loss, but like the kind that gets you dizzy and then the cramps and the nausea but you just HAVE to give me something because I can't go operate feeling like this!''

''Okay, okay… Do you want me to make an ultrasound, just to make sure everything's fine I mean'' she asks me while already grabbing the equipment.

''Whatever as long as you give me something for this freaking pain'' I mumble.

This sucked, I was doing so well not talking to anyone.

''How've you been?'' she asks me while I lay down on the table.

''Avoiding everyone and working my ass of with as little sleep as possible. You?'' she smiles at my honesty.

''Going back to L.A., you know we could always use a good pediatric surgeon such as yourself'' she tells me.

This is the first time I talked to someone in two weeks and Addison just asked me to move to L.A., leave this place and leave Calliope…

''It's sunny over there'' she gives me a wink.

''I'll think about it'' I answer her truthfully.

''Good, that was the answer I was aiming for! Now let's take a look at your uterus'' she says while moving the ultrasound over my lower abdomen.

I couldn't see the screen, and even if I could I'm not good at reading ultrasounds. I mean when there's a fetus in there I know where I'm supposed to look at, being a PED surgeon and all. But an empty uterus? No idea, that's why there are surgeons like Addison, I think to myself. I see her stare at the screen with a puzzled look on her face.

''What is it?'' I ask her, she shakes her head 'no'. ''Tell me Addison'' I demand because her silence is freaking me out.

She turns the screen and what I see makes me grab the nearest trashcan to empty my stomach in.

It's silent for a really long time before Addison speaks up ''when did this.. I mean how?''

''The attack I guess… I blocked it…'' I fall silent, I can't speak for the longest time.

''How come you never told us?'' she asks gently.

''Because it's not a big deal. I mean it is, but I'll get over it. And it's not like I'm traumatized or something, besides look what happened to Calliope!''

''You can't compare the two Arizona'' she says to me quietly. It's silent again.

''I guess you have to book an OR?'' she nods 'yes'.

''You know that an extra uterus gravida has no chance, especially because it's abdominal and the risk of infection is getting larger every day so it's best if I go in asap" I just nod " you want me to call someone before I arrange an OR?''

''Uhm, yeah could you page Teddy and maybe tell her? And I want this on the down low, so please book me under a different name?''

''Of course, I'll put you under a Jane Doe and talk to the chief about instructing the OR personnel about discretion and stuff'' she tells me while grabbing some pills from a shelf and handing them to me, they're sedatives. ''Take them in 20 minutes, I'll be ready within 45 minutes to come and get you.''

''Thanks Addison, you're the best'' I smile at her.

''Don't thank me yet'' she says while giving me a kiss on my cheek and leaving the room.

I hope Teddy comes soon because I really don't want to be alone, it's not healthy for me. I'll start thinking and stuff, not good, not good at all. After less then 5 minutes Teddy already walks in ''sweetie'' she says while laying down next to me and wrapping her arms around me. I start to sob quietly.

''Do you want to tell me how this happened?'' she asks me in a gentle tone.

So I tell her about the attack and about what happened that night in the alley, and this time I tell her everything. I tell her how Calliope was held down by one of the guys being forced to watch me get raped by the other one. ''Did you at least tell the police?'' she asks.

''I told them after Callie woke up and didn't remember, by then it was to late to do a rape kit'' I answer her.

''Are you okay? That's a dumb question I know, what I meant was do you need to talk about this? With a counselor maybe?'' she asks.

''Uhm yeah I probably do need counseling, but because my fiancée doesn't remember me. Not because of this.'' I tell her but she doesn't respond.

''Can I look at the ultrasound?'' she asks after a while. I nod my approval but turn my head away, I don't want to see it again.

''It looks pretty complicated'' she begins.

''Good thing I'm here then'' Addison says while walking inside my room. ''Are you ready for this Robbins?'' she asks.

''As ready as I'll ever be. How are you going to do it?'' I ask her. ''I'm going to make a incision in your lower abdomen of about 1 inch and remove the fetus laparoscopically by guiding a vacuum to where the fetus is. Which we know is located against your pelvic bone.'' She explains to me.

Teddy started to help me get ready for the OR while Addison made sure I had a IV line in my arm.

''No scar!'' I tell Addison who smiles at me

''You already sound like a true L.A. woman'' she jokes.

At this point there's a knock on the door and Mark walks in.

''Do you mind?'' he asks me, he looks concerned and very angry.

''We're about to go in to the OR Mark so make it quick'' Addison tells me while leaving the room, Teddy follows her outside.

He sits next to me and takes one of my hands in to his ''tell me what he looks like'' his voice is calm but I can see the emotions in his eyes.

''Mark don't be silly, I already told the police what happened they're looking for them'' I squeeze his hand to reassure him.

''I feel like a complete fool… All this time I was so focused on Callie that I didn't even check if you were okay'' I can see it in his eyes, he feels guilty.

''Mark you don't have to feel guilty or something. It's not your fault, I didn't tell you guys because I wanted you to focus on her instead of me. I'll be okay, I already agreed on going to see a therapist. I know I can't run away from this anymore.'' I tell him, a few tears escape my eyes.

He takes me into a big bear hug, I love him for this. Mark and I don't always see eye to eye but he's such a good guy. And he really cares for Calliope and apparently also for me.

''I swear to God I'll hunt the bastard who did this down and kill him, just give me a description of what he looks like. Anything, and I promise you he'll never be able to breathe again'' he whispers in my ear.

''Promise me you won't tell Callie'' I ask him.

''We'll talk about this after your surgery'' he says to me.

At that point Teddy and Addison come walking in. ''I'm sorry but it's time, you know the longer we wait''

''I know I know'' I interrupt Addison. ''You all have to promise me you won't tell Calliope'' I tell them.

But they ignore me, and I'm getting tired of fighting them over this. ''No scars!'' I tell Addison again

''You won't scar, I'll make sure of that'' Mark winks at me.

''What was that thing about L.A. by the way?'' Teddy asks.

''I'll tell you after Addison is done with me. Now let's remove this out of uterus pregnancy!'' I tell them in a semi-excited voice.

They all look at me with concerned faces ''what? It's true right?'' I ask them. They all shake their heads as if to say that I shouldn't be joking about this. But I have to, I have to stop thinking about it all. Because if I don't, I don't know if I'll ever be able to stop crying.

* * *

**A/N: don't freak out about the 'pregnancy' please. Just remember in the first season Christina had a out of uterus pregnancy as well, only hers was attached to one of her ovaries. An out of uterus pregnancy (especially an abdominal one) has about zero precent chance of surviving.**


	14. Chapter 14

**14**

One week later

**Callie's POV  
**I haven't talked or seen Arizona in over 3 weeks, not since my date with Erica. It's like she's a ghost, sometimes I find an empty coffee cup or laundry drying to know that she's been home, other then that no sign at all. Next to Erica I haven't talked to anyone yet, and I don't count the visits of Christina since she refuses to talk about anything else then surgeries. I still find it nice that she stops by every other day, she told me for example that Jackson applied for Trauma instead of Ortho. He told her he only wants to be taught by me, which is flattering of course but I do feel sorry for the kid. One more reason to remember the past, but as the days pass by I lose hope. What if I'll never remember? I ask myself as I clean up the kitchen. I stumble upon a crumbled piece of paper of which I recognize the handwriting immediately from.

''_Calliope! =D I hope you've slept well! I'm starting work again today, but if you need ANYTHING you should page me! I mean it! =D Oh! And I wanted to say that ''_

She apparently stopped writing. What did she want to tell me? I figured she'd be at the hospital… She probably has a lot of catching up to do, but why didn't she finish her note? And then it hits me, Erica! She probably ran into Erica and assumed that… I had the idea that she and Erica didn't get along, but I still wondered why Arizona would be mad if she ran in to Erica that morning. I decide to go down to the hospital and talk about this with her, I mean we're roommates, she can't avoid me forever right?

Just outside the hospital I bump into Mark.

''Have you seen Arizona?'' I ask him.

''You mean you haven't heard? Then what are you doing here?'' he asks me confused.

''I'm here to talk to Arizona, she's been avoiding me for almost 3 weeks now'' I explain to him.

His expression changes to one I can't quite place. ''Let's talk inside'' he says while already walking towards the entrance of the hospital.

It's starting to rain so I have really no objections to going inside, although I'd really like to know what the hell is going on to make Mark acting this strange. Mark led me into an on call room and sat me down on the bed before taking a chair and sitting down in front of him.

''There's no easy way to say this so I'm just going to say it'' he begins. ''Arizona had an emergency surgery last week, she spend the two days in the ICU but she's doing alright now.''

I stared at him in disbelief, my mouth opening and closing several times.

''What kind of surgery?'' I asked him after a few minutes.

Mark looks a bit uneasy before answering me ''she had an out of uterus pregnancy… Addison was able to remove the fetus without damaging her uterus or ovaries.'' Again I fall silent, and here I was thinking that Arizona was gay.

''Was… I mean does this have anything to do with her fiancée?'' I ask him.

''No not really, but… well I'll let Arizona explain that to you. But before you go in you should know that she didn't know she was pregnant in the first place. I mean it was an abdominal EUG so most of the time'' he stops his train of thought when his pager goes off.

''Oh, and you might want to avoid the 'father' subject'' he says to me while standing up. ''Are you coming?'' he asks me when I'm not following him towards the door.

''First you're going to tell me what's up with Erica and everyone else. Arizona is been avoiding me for about 3 weeks and you went all psycho on us when we walked in. Which was the last time I saw Lexie by the way. I want to know what I did wrong before I face her Mark.'' I tell him, tears prickling in my eyes.

He sighs before sitting next to me on the bed.

''Listen to me Torres, I never tell you who to date or who not to date and I'm not about to change that'' I want to argue but he interrupts me. ''However, I don't want to see you make the same mistake twice... She really hurt you badly once Callie.'' And he told me about my short but apparently eventful relationship with Erica Hahn.

Teddy was sitting next to her, they were laughing, which is a good sign I think to myself. I had to gather all my courage to walk into the room and when I finally did I couldn't speak.

''I'll leave you two for a while'' Teddy says as she stood up to leave.

''No that's alright, you can stay. It doesn't look like Callie has much to say anyway.'' Arizona said. Okay that hurt, I don't know why but it did.

''I'm…I'm sorry for you'' I managed to get out before turning around and leaving again.

That didn't go well, that didn't go well at all. But I guess she has a right to be angry, from what Mark told me she and him had to work really hard to 'mend' me after the Erica 'thing'. And with everything that's happened in the past few weeks, after everything they've done for me, I seek out… I don't know 'something' with Erica. I could've asked either one of them out to thank them for everything they've done for me. But instead I believed Erica when she told me they needed 'Callie free time'.

I walk through the hospital, not really knowing what to do or who to turn to when I bump into Bailey.

''Torres! Can't you see I'm standing here?'' she tells me off, but when she sees the tears in my eyes she pushes me into the nearest on call room.

Seriously what is it with these people and on call rooms?

''When you'll remember me you'll remember that I don't do this'' she points back and forth between the two of us. ''Talk'' she explains when she sees my confused look.

''I mean I talk, I just don't talk about anyone's personal life. Because I'm a professional, so I'd rather spend my time talking about patients and how to safe them. Just for now I'll make an exception, but don't you go telling people I'm a great listener because I'm not. You get that?'' she asks me a bit stern, I nod my head 'yes'.

''Good now you have 14 minutes, go'' she checked her watch and positioned herself so she sits a bit more comfortable.

I looked at her, a bit stunned actually, she tapped her index finger on her watch implying time was running out. So I just start talking, I tell her everything. From the moment I just woke up to Erica, to Arizona who just sort of kicked me out of her room. When I finish I'm emotionally drained, but I feel relieved as well, I guess talking really does help then.

''Torres you listen to me and you listen good. Dr Hahn is nothing but trouble, don't go there because you'll end up getting hurt. As for Arizona, I really can't tell you anything until you remember your past. But what I can tell you is that she's a good person and a great friend. I'm sure she's emotional and pissed off right now but she'll turn around. Keep bugging her and give her a stuffed animal and she'll be perky and sunshine in no time. But if you don't want to be her friend then just go, pack your stuff and find another place to live. She doesn't need a roommate who'll take advantage of her'' she tells me.

''I would never do that!'' I defend myself.

''I'm just saying, we love you and we want to help you with everything, especially Arizona. But after everything she's been through… She can't handle your love life drama as well'' she says while standing up.

''Find your trigger Torres, find your trigger and you'll find your memories'' and with that she leaves the room.

**Arizona's POV  
**I was telling Teddy to stop making me laugh because it hurts to much when Calliope walked in. She stood there, not saying anything, she looked like a goldfish actually. But she was the most beautiful goldfish I've ever seen. Teddy said something about leaving but I didn't want to be left alone with Calliope in the same room, so I practically ordered her to stay. Okay, I might've made a stupid comment about Callie, but I really didn't want her here.

''I'm… I'm really sorry for you'' she blurs out before leaving the room.

As soon as she leaves the room Teddy turns around and faces me again.

''Was that really necessary Arizona?'' she asks me a bit annoyed.

I didn't answer her ''Zona!'' I choose to ignore her still. ''Robbins! It's not Callie's fault that she got stabbed and hit her head on a side walk which made her forget your life together before that!''

''Of course not Teddy! I'm not blaming her!'' I reply.

''Really? Then why are you sending her away?'' she snapped back.

''Because! I told you about Erica!''

''She doesn't remember Zona! She doesn't have a clue what's going on around her. Erica was probably being nice to her and didn't look at her as if she saw a ghost!''

''How the hell am I supposed to act when her ex girlfriend is spending a night with her, MY fiancée?''

''Talk to her! Or me! Or Addy or anyone! You do realize that you have some sort of PTSD right? Can you tell your therapist what happened?'' she asks me, but I don't respond, I stay quiet. ''You've got to be kidding me Arizona!'' she yells at me.

''What? I've been busy Teddy!'' I yell back at her. She stops in her tracks and looks at me.

''That's what you and Addison were talking about… you're planning to leave'' she looks at me like I just killed her favorite dog, I can't stand it so I look down.

''I'm right aren't I?'' she asks me, but I still don't answer her. ''Dr Arizona Marie Robbins, are you or are you not planning on moving to L.A.?'' she goes all G.I. Jane on me, so I have to answer her.

''Yes'' I reply feeling guilty.

It stays quiet for a really, really, really long time. When I finally have enough courage to look up, I can see tears in her eyes.

''I whish you good luck then'' she says before turning around to leave.

She's already in the doorway when I stop her ''please Ted wait, can't we talk about this?''

She looks at me and closes the door again.

''What do you want me to say? I flew half way around the world for you and you've been giving me crap ever since! I told myself it was because of what happened and that you'd turn around, but you won't let me help you! You don't talk to me Zona! And now you're moving away because of what? Because she still doesn't remember you? Because you where raped and got pregnant? What the hell Zona! You used to be able to talk about everything with me! We used to drive Callie crazy because of the amount of time that we spend together and now your treating me like I'm just another colleague.''

She waited for me to say something but I couldn't talk anymore. She was right, I became a selfish bitch and I threw her away like garbage on the street because I couldn't handle it anymore. She turned around when she stood in the doorway.

''Your father would be very ashamed of you right now Robbins. This'' she points up and down my body ''is not a good man in a storm, you let me down'' and with that she slammed the door shut, and let me alone in my room. Crying like there's no tomorrow.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N no1: Okay I don't even know where to begin, let's just start with I'm SO SORRY about the ridiculous LONG delay! I'm not sure what happened and why, there really is no excuse. I don't even know if people still want to read this, but let's just humor me and say you will.**

**A/N no2: I edited the previous chapters, nothing huge changed but since it's been so long you'll probably have to read them to know what the hell I'm talking about ;-)**

**A/N no3: Again my apologies.  
**

* * *

**15**

**Callie's POV  
**As I'm leaving the on call room Bailey left me in earlier I bump into a clearly upset Teddy.

''Watch it!'' she snaps at me before realizing it's me.  
''Sorry, can I do something for you?'' I ask her while she tries to cover up her tears.

At hearing my voice she looks up. I'm not really sure what it is I see in her eyes, but there's something in there, anger? Is she angry with me as well? What on earth did I do to her?

''It's not you'' she answers my unspoken question.

''Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to Joe's so I can forget about Arizona's stubbornness. But I guess you know everything about that since she's your''  
''Roommate!'' Mark interjects her angry ramble.

She looks pissed at his sudden appearance and walks towards the exit. Addison meets up with her and I see them leave, probably in search of tequila.

I feel Mark's arm giving me a hug.  
''Come on kiddo let's follow them ladies in search of liquor, he tells me.

''No I'm good, I think I'm going to go check on Arizona'' I tell him while walking towards her room.

''Ha! I see your stubbornness is coming back as well'' he jokes before he gives me a hug and walks away.

**Arizona's POV  
**I wake up and see Calliope sitting in a chair next to me, drooling on my bed, she looks adorable. I try shifting a bit without her waking up, but I can see her beautiful eyes opening slowly, adjusting to the light.

''How do you feel? Can I get you anything?'' she asks me in a bit of a husky voice from just waking up, it's undeniably sexy.

''I'm alright, thank you'' I reply softly. It stays silent for a while.

''Do you want me to go?'' she asks, already making a move to stand up.

I grab her hand ''I don't know how to deal with this'' I tell her. She sinks back into her chair.

''Everyone tells me what to do, and how to deal with it, but I don't know which way is best.'' I start and I know I have to finish it.

''Mark tells me to just be myself, I tried doing that but in the end I don't know how. I don't know how to be myself without the love of my life next to me. I don't know how breathe without their touch. So then Christina opted to burry myself in my work, take on more cases. And I have to tell you that actually seemed to work for a while. But then I had to stand still, I had to stop because of my health. And the moment I stood still it all came back to me in tenfold. Addison offered me a job in L.A., I guess I can always consider that as my last option…'' I take a deep breath before I continue, because I know if I don't then I'll never be able to pull through.

''Teddy tells me I have to talk. I have to let people back in my life, I have to explain my feelings to them. So that's what I'm trying to do now, starting with you.'' God Calliope must think I'm insane! She probably doesn't even know what the hell I'm talking about!

Calliope takes my hand in hers ''first of all I wanted to apologize about Erica'' she starts but I quickly interrupt her.

''What you do and with who is really none of my business Calliope'' I tell her, trying not to sound to bitter.

''Probably not but still… I wanted you to know that nothing happened that night Erica stayed over.''

I try to hide my tears, I haven't been this happy since she first awoke from her coma.

''So, you're going to try and talk now?'' she asks me with a beautiful smile playing on her lips.

**Callie's POV  
**After Arizona told me what happened to her and her fiancée I have to try really hard not to stand up and go running around the city to look for the guy. She stayed a little bit vague on the details, like what happened to her fiancée. I opt to ask her about it but she doesn't look ready to talk about it.

''Could you maybe call Teddy and ask her to meet me? I have to explain a couple of things to her as well'' she asks me with a bit of a tremor in her voice.

I stand up and kiss her forehead ''sure'' I whisper closely to her skin.

It seemed like the right thing to do, the kiss I mean. Well not entirely the right thing to do, the right thing to do would be kissing those beautiful pink lips but fortunately I can control myself. I give her my biggest smile before leaving the room.

After waiting a few minutes Teddy meets me at the nurses station nearby Callie's room.

''Is she okay?'' she asks me still trying to catch her breath from what I presume her running from Joe's to here under 5 minutes.

''She asked me to get you… she told me about how she, well how she ended up in the OR last week'' I tell her.

Teddy looks at me in disbelief, but then there's a smile beginning to form on her lips. ''Good, she should talk! Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to make her grovel for a bit. So don't expect to hear from her anytime soon'' she tells me with a now wicked looking grin on her face.

''Why does she have her 'evil smile' on her face?'' Addison asks me curious, looking at Teddy entering Arizona's room.

''I really don't' want to know'' I reply to her.

''Do you want to join me at Joe's? Mark had to go back to the hospital and it doesn't look like Teddy will join me anytime soon'' she asks me while already gently pushing me in the direction of the hospital exit.

''Oh wait I have to get something from my locker'' she says while already pulling towards the other direction again.

We walk into a room that says 'Attendings lounge', it looks familiar, I stop to try and take it all in.

''Are you okay?'' she asks me while opening a locker.

''This place, it looks familiar'' I answer her.

She smiles at me ''good! Small steps Cal, small steps.'' She walks towards a different locker. ''This one is yours'' I try to open it but I don't know to number combination. ''When is my birthday again?'' I ask her whilst trying the standard four zero's and one, two, three, four's.

''You wouldn't have used **your** birthday as a combination'' she tells me with a grin.

''Then who's?'' I try to pry it out of her.

''Patience'' she says, while locking her arm in mine and turning towards the exit.

We sit in a booth and she's telling me about her life and clinic in L.A.

''Why are you working at SGMW when you have your own clinic in L.A.?'' I ask her.

''Because of you silly'' she answers me matter of factly.

''Isn't your practice falling apart without you?'' I ask her genuinely concerned.

She laughs at this.

''They'll manage a few weeks without me. Besides when you do remember everything again, you're going to want me here to get Mark of your back because believe me he'll smutter you'' she jokes.

After we eat a salad I ask her how Arizona's doing, physically.

''You know as well as I do **Doctor** Torres, that I can't give you patient's information without their consent.'' I pout at her. ''But I'm waiting for some blood work to come back, if that turns out okay I'll discharge her this afternoon'' she finishes.

''What happened to patient doctor confidentiality?'' I joke.

''I think I remember your name as a contact somewhere in her file'' she winks at me.

''So why don't you go home and make her a nice 'welcome home dinner'? I'll make sure one of us will bring her home around 5pm.''

I smile wildly at her and check my watch to see it's already 2 pm.

''Go!'' she tells me. I quickly put down enough cash to cover the bill.

''Thank you Addy, you're a good friend'' I tell her after I hug her.

''And don't you forget it!'' she yells at me when I'm already at the door.

My first stop was at the grocery store to get the ingredients for the chicken picata recipe that Lexie taught me how to make. When I get back to the apartment I start cleaning and getting dinner ready.

Addison later texts me that Arizona's blood work came back and everything looks good. I nearly jump in the air because of my excitement.

I don't know what's going on with me, why I'm so incredibly happy that Arizona's coming home but I am. And all I can think about are her beautiful sapphire blue eyes en dimpled smile.

I take a long shower and pick out a nice outfit to wear. It's 4.30 pm so I decide to clean up Arizona's room before she comes back. After I put away all her medical textbooks, I start changing her bed sheets when a picture falls on the ground. When I pick it up my heart suddenly stops. There in that picture I see Arizona staring in the lens with so much love it nearly melts my heart. Next to her a woman kisses her cheek with a huge smile on her face, I recognize the woman as myself. I gasp for air as I fall down on my knees.

**Arizona's POV  
**Teddy and I talked for a long time, we're good again. She's making me laugh so hard right now I'm concerned my stitches will burst.

''What's up with all this noise?'' Mark asks while walking in.

At this moment there are literally tears running down my face so I'm not able to explain our behavior.

''You chicks are weird'' he jokes after pulling up a chair on the other side of my bed.

''Listen Blondie, I just wanted to let you know that I'll support you. Even if that means you moving to L.A.'' he tells me in a more serious tone.

The atmosphere in the room changes, just as I want to answer him Addison walks in the room.

''I hope you're not talking about L.A. 'cause I think the chief will kill me if I steal his head of pediatric surgery from underneath his nose'' she says while checking my chart.

''So you don't want me to come back to L.A. with you?'' I ask her confused.

''Oh I want you to, believe me I want you to. But apparently the gossip mill has reached Richard and he made it very clear to me what he would do to me and my career if you decided to move down there'' she says with half a mile on her face.

''Good that's settled then'' Marks says.

''What happened to you being supportive and stuff?'' I ask him.

''You know that was all Lexie, I would've kicked your ass from here to Sunday if you'd moved there.''

''Well I have some other good news for you'' Addison quickly interrupts. ''Your blood work looks perfect so I'm really here to discharge you'' she tells us with a huge smile on her face.

''I'll get some booze so we can celebrate tonight'' Mark says while Teddy's already packing my stuff.

''No you're not'' Addison says while blocking the door. ''Callie's home to celebrate this with Arizona, we'll meet them later at Joe's.''

I can't wait to go back home, I know that Calliope still doesn't remember anything, but as Teddy pointed out maybe I have to help her remember her in another way. I blush slightly at the images that are now flying through my head.

''Ah! You're thinking McNasty Blondie! Care to share?'' Mark asks eagerly. Teddy and Addison slap him at the same time.

''No Mark you don't have to come in, I can carry my own bags'' I tell him before shutting the door in his face and locking it so he can't get in with his spare key.

The apartment looks wonderful, Calliope lit candles and I smell chicken picata.

''Calliope?'' I call out her name but get no response. I walk around the apartment to look for her, she's not in her room or bathroom. I see that the door to what has become my room is slightly open, when I walk in I see Calliope kneeled on the floor with her back towards me.

''Calliope?'' I say her name softly, but she still doesn't respond.

I kneel down in front of her, she has a picture in her hand. FUCK! It's the picture of Calliope and me showing off our engagement rings! She looks me in my eyes, tears silently falling over her face.

''Calliope I'm SO sorry I didn't tell you about'' she puts her finger on my lips to silence me.

''Ortho right?'' she repeats the first words I ever spoke to her before cupping my face with both hands and reaching forward.

The moment her lips touch mine I know she has found me again.

**Callie's POV  
**The moment I saw the picture it all came rushing back to me, the hospital, my job, my parents, my high school graduation, Mark, Addison, Erica, George O'Malley, but most of all a pair of sapphire blue eyes.

I hear her come home and I want to run towards her but I'm still paralyzed by the shock.

The moment my lips touch hers I know I'm home, and I know that she's the one who guided me there.

* * *

**A/N no4: Penny for your thoughts? ;-)**

**A/N no5: Epilogue yes/no?**


End file.
